I've been posting a lot of stuff on facebook and have neglected the people to whom I promised I would send updates and photographs. We're so busy here in Vietnam that I'm always too tired to compose posts to the blog. So I'm testing to see if I can paste the facebook postings. Will people who are not subscribers to facebook be able to go to the links? Please e t me know if it works.
This first set of posts is about the journey I've dreamed of taking --- I've dreamed of it for the past 45 years. But first, I'm giving you a link to a short film I shot of the Soc Trang Army Airfield in 1968. If you were to stop the film at about eight seconds into it, you'll see the place I would end up at all these years later.
Here are the related facebook posts in the order that I posted them. Please let me know if I should include the people's comments after each post. I plan to send more dispatches --- each with its own theme. Feedback, please.
This first set of posts is about the journey I've dreamed of taking --- I've dreamed of it for the past 45 years. But first, I'm giving you a link to a short film I shot of the Soc Trang Army Airfield in 1968. If you were to stop the film at about eight seconds into it, you'll see the place I would end up at all these years later.
Here are the related facebook posts in the order that I posted them. Please let me know if I should include the people's comments after each post. I plan to send more dispatches --- each with its own theme. Feedback, please.
Pete
and I have hired a car and driver to take us to Soc Trang, where I
served most of the time I was in Vietnam. This will be the emotional
part for me. I'll report back.
Thanks for your support.
Thanks for your support.
- Suzi Grantham, Michael P Rolfes, Linda Chancler and 23 others like this.
- Milena Marold Danneker I admire your courage, then and now. Thanks for sharing; it humbles and enriches me, every step of the journey.
- Don Ray It turned out to be one of the most meaningful journeys of my life. Stay tuned. 12 hours on the road. Dramatic ending to the story and, I hope, a new beginning.
- Elizabeth Lynn Moon Excellent timing! The full moon eclipse occurring shortly is about releasing old patterns and emotional baggage. When it comes up, bless it and release it!
- Don Ray This morning Pete and I are sorting out all of the expected emotions as well as the ones that are coming up the morning after. It's becoming very clear to me that, in one sense, my adult life began there at that little airfield. And in many ways, it became frozen in time. I never realized the impact that that one location could have on my life for the next 45 years. As we depart for the remote part of Laos, these feelings will become even more important.
- Milena Marold Danneker So glad you are doing this , for you, perhaps for others. I can't imagine what this means to you, what the feelings are. With caring, supportive thoughts.... and interested about your internet... connections. It is a global village... now a www. Thinking of you.
- Don Ray I don't know about any wisdom, Linda. There's a lot unfolding. It's an amazing journey, for sure. I'm glad you enjoy it. There's so much more to come as we head out for the remote parts of Southern Laos. Yikes!
- Linda Chancler Just read one of Pierre's dispatches, great combnation of accounts - the writing. Really good, had no idea of the historical significance date-wise. Mind you i was thatlittle kid having dinner in front of the television, body counts, Mi Lai, The fall o...See More
It
felt like a page out of The Wizard of Oz. We ended up hiring a taxi
with a driver, Thanh, who spoke no English. His friend, Duc, arranged
it. Duc runs the camera shop near our hotel. He's a problem solver who
was available all day to translate from
afar. It took four hours to get to Soc Trang. Once we were there, it
became a classic comedy as we tried to find any one of several things
that would help us locate former airfield: Someone who speaks very good
English. A map of Soc Trang. A computer with Internet access. After
Thanh spent an hour or two asking people for directions to "the airport"
(I knew it was no longer an airport, but I couldn't communicate that to
him). It would always take us to a modern-day Vietnamese military
airport --- which was clearly not the one I needed to find. Finally, I
tried for the English-speaking person. We hopped from one hotel to
another in the hope that someone at the front desk could speak English.
If I could only describe a couple of landmarks and locate them, I could
find my way to the former airfield where I left my youth. Eventually, we
found one woman, Hoa, who said she spoke good English. It's a long
story, but we ended up deputizing her and another employee (no English)
who was sure he knew where I wanted to go. We drove for more than an
hour. Each time I felt we were close, Hoa would tell our driver
something that would send him in the wrong direction. Hoa's co-worker,
Fat, wanted to get out of the taxi to ask local people. I wanted the
driver do drive just a little bit further. I knew in my heart that I was
close. But they couldn't find Fat. I'll leave you with this comical
scene: Don Ray gets out of the taxi and starts walking up the road as
the sun was signalling that it was retiring for the night and taking its
light with it. Hoa is running behind me calling out, "Sir! Mr. Don!
Come back!"
Stay tuned.
Stay tuned.
- Michael Torres, Masa Kenney, Julie May Seltzer and 14 others like this.
- Linda Chancler As the foodie that I am, this day has surely gone on too long without a meal, please tell us about the food.
- Linda Chancler Holding breath about what happens next, a wifi signal that gives you gps coordinates?
- William Prather Great picture for the story. Those expressions on their faces are worth 1000 words. Odd outfit on the girl, looks like a shirt with a bib on top of it - probably a sloppy eater.
- Susan Roberts Prolly need to smoke some ganga and chill Don Ray. Next thang ya know, that airport will appear like a mirage in the desert. Lovin' the travelogue.
- Don Ray You're talking about Susan? I don't understand what she's talking about. I don't smoke anything. But probably everyone else knows. Hoa was wearing the traditional Vietnamese outfit. I'm not sure if it's an apron as well.
- Dave Williamson Susan was talking about smoking pot! Not sayin I know anything about that, But the big boys in the Barracks said it was fun!
- Don Ray Hey, we're in Laos now and I'd hate to have the authorities grab my computer and see all of this talk about illegal activities. Like, chill, man? You got my groove? Right arm!
- Jim Comer Actually, I was making fun of people, most of whom speak English, who think that Laos has two syllables.
- April 30 at 2:21pm · Unlike · 1
- When we last left you in Soc Trang, Vietnam, a frustrated Don Ray had bailed out of the taxi and decided to go it on foot. His helpful entourage didn't seem to grasp that the sun was going down quickly and these were the last possible moments in which he could see that small airfield in which he had left some important part of his youth. 45 years of dreaming and longing to return had boiled down to a follow-your-nose-and-instincts run up the road. There was a wall that wasn't there before, but I knew in my heart that the airstrip was on the other side. A mound of dirt. It was just high enough to allow me to see over the wall, I thought. The helpful hotel clerk we had picked up, Hoa, was running behind me saying, "Mr. Don! Come back!" From the top of the mound, I could see buildings that hadn't been there in 1968. But it felt right. I couldn't see the ground on the other side of the wall. Then I saw the building to my left and it appeared to have a rear balcony that offered a view of what I knew was the old runway on the other side of the wall. With Hoa chasing behind me, I went up to the bars that protected the entrance to this residence. I put my hands in the prayer position as called out, "May I please take a picture from your balcony?"
Hoa caught up with me and started to tell me that I shouldn't be doing . . . "Hoa, please, please, please translate this." A woman and her teenager daughter were walking toward the gate. Hoa came through for me. The quickly opened the gate and escorted us up the stairs and to the door to the balcony. My heart erupted in joy and the tears nearly kept me from being able to shoot the place where I had somehow, strangely, left a part of me.
It was hard to focus the camera. The tears and emotions blurred my vision, but not my memories. I could see the end of the runway. I knew that the runway was the only thing left of the Soc Trang Army Airfield. While Hoa, the woman of the house and her daughter looked on (the girl was shooting with her camera phone), I saw the places on that airstrip where I had left a part of my youth. I could see the places where the mortars had pounded the ground. I could see where the dog kennels were and where our hooch had been. I saw the crashes of the UH-1 helicopter gunships and the moving shadows on the ground that the parachute flares would make when the wind would blow them past Fritz and me after we'd been hit. I could taste the C-Rations and see the faces of my Vietnamese friends --- friends who adopted me as their brother. I could hear them smiling when they'd see me. "Nguyen Van Don! Hello Nguyen Van Don!" They called me Nguyen Van Don because I was their brother.— with Pierre Beauregard at Soc Trang Army Airfield, Soc Trang, Vietnam.
I relived a lot in the three or four minutes I stood there. I could finally see the place where a young man first discovered that he could survive by his wits, by his intelligence and by his creative passion --- despite what everyone in his life had told him. For a moment, I mourned the loss of his youth, but realized that it's still there and it's moving me forward today. The 4-hour ride back to Saigon was peaceful.
7 comments:
Don, all I can say is you are an amazing human being and I am so very fortunate to be a part of your life and to share some of the most incredible experiences that any one individual can possible dream of. I believe that there are some wonderful things still coming up in the near future for you and I am convinced that you will be able to share with the rest of the world some of your most precious experiences. I love you buddy.
Efrem
Don, I have tears running down my face reading your blog. I bring back many memories since we have been there. I would like to see your pictures of the air field when you return. Have a great trip. Marty Maier
I have to tell you that it felt wonderful to read these first two comments to this post. What we experienced in those forgotten times in a place that is now just a memory touched Efrem --- even though he wasn't there. His empathic nature gives me encouragement and inspires me to move forward with the projects of my life. I am especially thrilled that Marty Maier was able to take the journey --- by way of my silly blog --- and revisit Soc Trang. He was the most welcoming of the guys at Soc Trang when I arrived, and I missed him terribly when he left and things for me there went south. He left a vacuum that, I'm sad to remember, got filled with negative spirit. How selfish of me to wish that he had stayed longer instead of going home. Marty, I'm embarrassed to show my tears to someone to whom I looked up so much. To know that you too are shedding tears for your own loss makes me feel less alone. I've been doing oral history interviews with so many veterans of WWII and I envy them for being able to have lifelong buddies from their time in the service. So many of us came home alone --- without anyone with whom we could share the laughter and the pain. Marty, it's been 45 years. Let's plan on meeting for a hug, a handshake, some laughter and a few boxes of Kleenex. Thanks so much!
Since we spoke just prior to you leaving, I had no idea how I looked forward to your every post....and was disappointed they were so short..I questioned myself "Was this because we were friends"...that question took all of a quarter second to answer....No, I found myself intrigued, and invested in your journey.....as wished for more. Talk about being teased. I believe that a person would have to have been aware of Vietnam at that time, to get what I got out of your words...but, this is just my opinion,,,,just as I believe that those same people would love every word you've written....and be disappointed that there wasn't more. it screams "Book", or Documentary. I just hope today's classic "Target group : the 18 -39" could appreciate it.
Fran,
You're already a part of this. You became a part of it when you reached into your pocket when we met for lunch and slipped me some money. I knew you couldn't afford it, but you volunteered it to make sure we didn't get stranded there. It came in handy. Thanks again! This is, indeed, about friends.
Don Ray
I too, miss those days and the people I spent three tours with. Came home alone to much misery when all but a few including my wife now and immediate family would acknowledge me as anything near human. I slipped into a two year long attitude and re-entered the Army retiring in 1993 and moving to Florida for 18 years before the passage of time finally let me realize that I had created my own misery and sought to end it. I feel more human now and returned to KY to reconnect with family in IN. Since discovering your blog the feelings of a need to revisit Soc Trang Army Airfield have returned and maybe before I leave this world I will make a journey as you did to find my youth left behind as I watched the airstrip disappear from the ramp of a C-130 as it climbed in the sky headed for Long Binh and shipment back to the US.
Emil, it's remarkable how a young man's experience in a war zone clings to him in so many ways. Now I know that ignoring it is impossible. Oh how I wish that young ears were able to comprehend what we old guys have to share about war --- once we figure it all out. Thanks for the poetic and tear-inspiring comment.
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