Dead Man Talking
Triggers, flashbacks, nightmares, isolation, panic attacks, anger, heightened arousal response and survivor’s guilt. Those are some of the topics we talk about every Friday at the V.A.’s East L.A. PTSD. (Post-Traumatic Stress) group session. I’m the only Vietnam veteran in the group. The others served in Iraq or Afghanistan or both. Some of them are angry with themselves for not being able to leave these things behind — after all, some have been back for several years. It doesn’t help when I share stuff that I’m experiencing 44 years after I came back.
Some of the triggers are embedded in the calendar. We all
remember the dates we deployed or the dates that all hell broke loose. PTSD
counselors know some of the important anniversaries as well. They know they may
have to work overtime to help the veterans find ways of coping.
One of the guys told us that he dreads the anniversary of
the day his unit began the ground offensive. Immediately, my pulse started
racing as I said to myself, “February 23rd!” That was the day in
1991 that U.S. troops
invaded Kuwait
in Operation Desert Storm. And even though I was at home in Burbank, that day will forever be etched in
my mind. It was the day that a broken radio took me on an eerie, maybe even
supernatural journey — a journey that encompassed my entire being.
It was all about triggers, flashbacks, nightmares, panic
attacks, anger, heightened arousal and survivor’s guilt. That broken radio
delivered it all.